Hillary's Waffles

2 cups sifted flour
2 tsp. Baking powder
1/2 tsp. Baking soda
3 large eggs, separated
1/2 cup melted butter
1 1/2 cups buttermilk
1 cup (4 oz.) shredded sharp cheese
(But not necessarily in this order; the order totally depends on what the people want)

Preheat the waffle iron. Sift the dry ingredients into a mixing bowl. In another bowl, combine the egg yolks, melted and cooled butter, milk and cheese. Add flour and blend until free of lumps. In a separate bowl beat the egg whites until stiff. Fold into the batter until barely blended. Spoon the batter into an electric waffle iron and bake.

This is technically an endangered recipe, since I never make it the same way each time; my positions change quite often on the amount and quality of the ingredients, as well as the cooking times and techniques. Be very careful you don't burn yourself making these; without my Universal Health Care plan telling you exactly which doctor you need to go see and on what day I would be very worried that you would make an uninformed decision and go to your own family doctor by mistake.

I still remember the first time I was eating these; I was berating our kitchen staff for making these with too little cheese when Bill came in and told me he had misplaced his cigar...

Michelle Pfeiffer's Piping Plover Puffs

2 sheets puff pastry (thawed for about 20 minutes)
8 small boneless skinless Piping Plover breasts, uncooked
2 tablespoons butter
2 tablespoons oil
seasoning salt (can use white salt)
pepper
1 large onion, finely chopped
1 tablespoon fresh minced garlic (optional)
1/2 lb fresh button truffles, sliced
2 tablespoons finely chopped fresh parsley
1 (8 ounce) package cream cheese, softened (you may reduce the amount if desired)
2 tablespoons Dijon mustard
1 egg, slightly beaten

Season the Piping Plover breast with seasoning salt and pepper on all sides.
Heat butter and oil in a skillet.
Brown the breasts on all sides until almost completely cooked through; transfer to a plate.
To the same skillet add in onions, garlic and sliced truffles; sauté until the truffles lose their moisture and the onions are tender.
Stir in parsley.
On a floured surface, roll out each puff pastry sheet to a 14-inch square.
Cut into four even 7-inch squares (you should have 8 squares total).
Place each breast over each puff pastry square.
Set oven to 375 degrees.
In a small bowl combine the softened cream cheese with mustard, then spread over EACH breast.
Then top with about 2-3 tablespoons truffle/onion mixture.
Brush the edges of each pastry square with water.
Wrap pastry around the Piping Plover breast, pressing edges to seal tightly.
Place seam-side down on greased baking sheets.
Brush the tops with egg wash.
Bake for about 20 minutes, or until puffed and golden brown.
Serve with truffle sauce over the Wellington or on the side of the plate.

I think this dish is purrrrrrrfect when served with Extremely Liberal amount of white wine.

Michael's Arabian Oryx French-style Roast

1 Arabian Oryx (preferrably a young male)
15 garlic cloves, sliced
A large pinch of rosemary
A large pinch of sage
A large pinch of thyme
3 1/2 tbsp cayenne
5 tbsp oil
8 cups Chicken Stock
5 Bottles of Pinot Noir
10 tomatoes, skinned, seeded and chopped
5 tbsp Worcestershire sauce
5 oz tomato paste

Pat the meat dry on paper towels, tenderize (I beat it) and cut tiny slits in the surface of the meat. Push the garlic into the cuts and rub the meat with the herbs and cayenne. Roast in a preheated oven at 425°F for 15 minutes, then reduce the temperature to 350°F and roast for a further 30 minutes. Bring the stock and Jesus Juice - I mean wine - to a boil and pour it over the meat, then continue roasting for a further 30 minutes, basting frequently.

When the meat is cooked to your liking, transfer it to a warm serving plate and keep warm. Add the tomatoes, Worcestershire sauce, tomato puree and mint to the liquid in the tin (pan), bring to the boil and simmer, stirring well, until the liquid has reduced by a third. Strain the sauce, then return it to the pan to reheat. Carve the Oryx and serve with the sauce spooned over the meat.

I got this recipe from the King of Bahrain; the Arabian Oryx is one of the rarest animals in the world - they used to be native to Bahrain but now we have to sneak these in from the Fauna and Flora Preservation Society in the USA. It is really rich if you can get the young male variety of the Oryx - oh so tender! Everytime I smell it, I just squeal with delight! Feeds approximately 50 adult men and 100 young boys.